MASC-LEANING non-binary peoples take note!
Me, first visit: not sure about areola or nipple size, I just want to never wear a bra again.
Him: ok, no bra ever again
Me, second visit, at the hospital, husband witnessed this: ok, here are pics, but as long as I never have to wear a bra
Stiller: repeated that back to me.
Now? Size B bra. Which is too tight, so probably size C. Down from size D. WOW, months of agony for 1 size reduction, because he is either completely stupid or doesn't care at all about his patients. Is he transphobic? Because nonbinary people are trans, and if he is going to ruin our lives for that reason, he's a bigot. Ask him why he'd do this to someone.
I wish I had never gone to this doctor. I went to him for breast reduction for gender dysphoria, and he told me to give him pics of before/after from breast augmentations. The picture my breasts look like were one of the "after" photos of breast augmentation. He even pointed to an AFTER pic of a… boob job, saying that's what mine look like. Well, yes, yes they do. They look like breasts look AFTER a breast augmentation. He also gaslighted me and tried to tell me that my breasts were smaller than they actually are. I'm probably 2 cup sizes larger than the BEFORE pictures. The reality is the reality and he can say that they're the size I wanted, but they're not. Its not reality.
Why would he do that? I don't know, ask him. I told him I wanted to never wear a bra again, and he repeated this back to me TWICE, then he gave me breasts that need a bra. And I still hurt 6 months later (update, 10 months in, still a lot of pain and burning). He did not care for me, and I have no faith that he will care for anyone else.
He did not manage my pain. I screamed and cried for months and he did not help me past the first week. I have given birth, had kidney stones, have had chronic pain almost my whole life, have been beaten within an inch of my life, and this was absolutely the worst pain I have ever ever had. And he did not manage it. So, now it is chronic.
I've had a yeast infection under my breast and I actually have CLEAVAGE. There is no way that the pictures I took to him could ever every achieve cleavage. Again, he gaslights.
This is absolutely the biggest mistake I've ever made in my life. I hated myself when I first went in, and I hate myself now. I actually hate myself worse than when I went in, because I was going to improve my life like I'd dreamed of doing for over 40 years, but all I got was months of agony and still a chest that I despise because he did not go by the pictures he told me to bring to surgery. So, for me, it's dysphoria, bras, pain, and yeast infections for the REST OF MY LIFE.
Not to mention his staff's HORRIBLE support after surgery. They don't even know where to find information about stretches after surgery. I had to cc the whole office to get responses. This started in the beginning when I emailed them to ask them the surgery time. I never got an answer. Glad the medical center knew the correct time of the surgery, because Stiller's staff did not answer me when I asked them.
I thought this would change my life in a positive way, that I could finally be myself. I thought I could celebrate and 'come out.' Instead, I'm not any closer than I was when I walked into his office. I can never 'come out' because I am disgusted with my body and don't want to be around people, just like before. I wear baggy shirts, not only because of the pain, but because it is agony to see my body the same way I saw it before: with disgust. I am totally devastated and I hope nobody else goes through this.
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