Dr. Reuben E Gross, PhD

I am a highly trained, experienced, warm, perceptive, understanding, and caring person. I’m easy to talk to and encourage my clients to open their hearts and say what’s on their minds. I see people in person and online. The most frequent opening statement by couples is “we don’t communicate well” leading to untold complaints and lingering problems. Many couples fear heated arguments and resentment so they just swallow their complaints. Others get into verbal fights with counter complaints and disrespectful behavior making the problem worse. To address this common problem I authored 5 articles on communication including “How to Complain Diplomatically and Even Argue Without Fighting.” Life as a single is not easy and it is more complicated in a couple/marital relationship. The title of one of my articles “Happily Ever After” is for fairy tales. In real life, 50% of American marriages end up in divorce and the tragedy is worse: 50% of the remaining couples are just as miserable as the …divorcees. Couples are wise to seek help when they are unhappy with their relationship. As a dually licensed marriage counselor and psychologist for over 40 years, I am very friendly, relaxed, warm, easy to talk to, and sensitive to interpersonal issues. My goal is to meet the specific and changing needs, hopes, and wishes of both spouses. I look forward to helping each couple find peace, contentment, happiness, and fulfilling love with their partner in a non-judgmental and solution-oriented manner. And it is very important that both partners are comfortable telling their partner their wishes and hopes as well as their complaints in a respectful manner and achieve excellent problem-solving skills. I’ve had intensive training in a variety of therapeutic modalities and techniques, and my skills have been honed over the years by my exposure to many clients in different personal situations and ethnical groups. I have worked in a variety of mental health settings both as a clinician and supervisor, and have taught psychology at the college level. I supervised physicians while serving as a staff consultant for a psychiatric training program at Bergen Pines Hospital. I supervised clinicians who came to my office on a weekly basis and I supervised graduate students at Rutgers University. And to discuss cases with peers I was a member of three peer supervisory groups over the years.I chaired nine clinical symposiums presented at the annual meetings of the NJ Psychological Association. I’ve written articles for the NJPA Psychologist, the Principal, and The Independent practitioner (publication of Division 42 , Psychologists in Independent practice of the APA) I see each person as a unique individual and am therefore eclectic in my approach. I’ve seen many marriage-minded singles and more than 1500 couples, I authored about 35 articles, some of which were to enlighten singles about marriage, and were published in a local newspaper, and 20 of which are geared to couples which I placed on my website. In order to get to know my clients better, I authored seven questionnaires asking each person many carefully phrased questions about their weaknesses and strengths and those of their partner. I email them to a new couple before our first meeting asking each person to clarify his/her expressed as well as unexpressed needs, wishes, and goals with their partner. These questionnaires save many hours of interviews and help us get down to business very quickly. Looking forward to working with you.